Growing

Two thumbs up for "About a boy" (movie)
Seriously. Wonderful movie.

Also, just like the body, the heart learns reeeeal slow. I had a dance teacher tell me once that if you do the same stretch diligently for several years, you may eventually get an inch or so more (or something like that). It amazed me. The body changes very slowly, she said. It gave me pause, because everything else seems to move so quickly. We have subdivided our time down to the hour, sometimes the minute even.
Another friend of mine tells me that when you go through a really stressful time in your life, your body reacts - your finger and toe nails grow differently (they grow some kind of lines or ridges, apparently), and your hair and skin get paler or something. But the kicker is that even months after your brain is done dealing with the stress, your body hasn't got the message yet.
And I'm realizing that's the way it is with the heart, too. And probably the soul. Someone told me something true about my life the other day, and when she did I realized I've been preparing to learn it for years... and then just now I realized it will take me time to ruminate and assimilate it... it will have to slowly percolate from the middle of my heart to the rest of it, and out through my beliefs into my actions. Eventually, this thing I learned will affect everything, just as the false belief I had before affected everything. But it will take time.

Recently I used the word "coagulate" to describe the moment when something you've been thinking about in stray thoughts now and again suddenly reaches critical mass and comes together in one illuminating swoosh. But then the moment after you're thinking about how amazing this revelation is, when you realize that you've been thinking the bits and pieces of it for weeks, months, maybe even years.
Even when trees grow fast it's not as fast as a high rise is built or a computer is assembled.
Minds and hearts aren't built; they're grown.
Growth is slower than we'd like.

also- there are so many people around me that give me love whenever I'm with them.
When the "out of sight, out of mind" concept applies, does that diminish love? My gut tells me yes... but not enough to discount the love that remains. But how much remains? And for how long?
What is the attrition rate of a love that is out of sight and out of mind? (and by love I mean any kind of affectionate tie... lover, best friend, friend, acquaintance, co-worker...)
What is the attrition rate of a love that is out of sight and out of mind?