Exasperation

Ahem.

Dear Dr. B.:
Why do you have to be such a jerk? As if it weren't enough that we have TWO big assignments to be working on (with all your little niggly requirements to think about and lots of mini-due-dates). As if you didn't KNOW, for a FACT that your precious research has shown that students tend to plateau out shortly after Spring break and then want to work the least right before finals. As if you weren't aware that we are probably fucking burnt out from your class alone, not to mention whatever else we might have going on in our lives (oh, I don't know, a minimum of two other four-credit classes that also have papers and finals and that sort of thing).
Disregarding all of that, you had to make up another assignment. And call it a game. And sugarcoat it by saying it's for extra credit and therefore, by definition, optional (as if - you know perfectly well that we're all scrambling to get as many points as possible because we have no idea how we're doing in your class since it's incredibly taxing and difficult and you won't give us our grades)*.
Nevermind that this "game" has all the hallmarks of a test - or one of those annoyingly snobby educational "puzzle" projects, where each group needs the others in order to complete their "creative" task. You present it like you are somehow under the delusion that it will be a fun and relaxing break.
I suppose I ought to be grateful there's no final exam.
But I will have you know, internet, that I am thoroughly exasperated with this woman.
Thoroughly exasperated. Not even the good mood induced in me by chips and salsa and a break for dinner & a little television is able to prevent my hitting the table in frustration.
Enough is ENOUGH. These next two weeks cannot end soon enough.

Over 'n out.
E.O.

*Oh, wait. I forgot. There's also that other assignment you gave us at the beginning of the semester. A portfolio, indicating our progress in the achievement of our goals for your class over time. Alright. Why don't I do that assignment. Right here, right now.


Eschew Obfuscation's Methods Class Portfolio, Spring 2011.

Initially, my goals were thus:

1. Achieve the highest grade possible on each assignment.
2. Make significant steps toward mastering scientific writing.
3. Deepen my knowledge of a new area of psychology.

They then changed to this:
"I want to make a log for Dr. B of the mental and emotional suffering a person goes through taking her class. I don't think she realizes anymore what she's putting people through. She does not have access to the rollercoaster of these emotions because people are too scared to tell her up front that the amount of stress she causes is bizarre and cruel in its intensity. So I will document it for her."

Five minutes later, I realized she'd interpret it like this:
"You really ought to go talk to someone and strategize about how you can have more time and emotional energy for this class. We have resources for that sort of thing. This is a hands-on class, and I warned you about that at the start of the semester."

Eventually my goals became:
"Turn things in complete and on-time. Try to keep up with the readings"

Then I gave up on the readings. After that I gave up on turning all but the biggest things in complete. These days I'm trying to keep turning stuff in on time, but it's really wrecking my life.

My goals as of now:
Hang on 'til April 28th. Time will continue to pass inexorably, and somehow (miraculously, it looks like from here), the things that have to get done will get done.
Or alternately:
Turn in a complete experiment. Make some kind of poster to present. Modify this portfolio and turn it in. Participate as little as possible in the "game" without screwing myself over too much.
(or for you spanish-speakers out there, I am putting la ley del mínimo esfuerzo into full effect)

DO YOU SEE THE DETERIORATION??? I wake up in the morning thinking about methods. In my spare time, I try to work out problems with my project. I cannot (but canNOT) focus on the work I have for other, equally important classes. Whenever people ask me about school, I start to vent about methods the second I catch a compassionate gleam in their eye.
...ironically enough, I probably succeeded in accomplishing those goals way up there at the top, just by dint of suffering through the class.
I also began the semester determined to attempt to love Dr. B according to 1 Corinthians 13. I am not sure just how miserably I failed at that, but I'm quite positive that I did. At least I didn't sic my parents on her, like people have in the past.

over 'n out. for real this time.
E.O.